Funny Quotes

If the world didn't suck, you'd fall off.

Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.

Costumers make clothes for imaginary people.

FOURTEEN THINGS THAT IT TOOK OVER 50 YEARS TO LEARN

By Dave Barry

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

5. You should not confuse your career with your life.

6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

7. Never lick a steak knife.

8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.

13. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

14. Your friends love you anyway.

Thought for the day: Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Long Time No See

Well, it's been far too long since I updated this little ol' blog. Much, ever so much has happened. I am back home from Qatar. I am no longer practicing law and there is much rejoicing. I am working at the Hale Theatre. You will kindly notice the "re" spelling; this distinquishes it from the Hale Theater. The "Re" is up in West Valley. So I do have quite a commute. But I love what I do. It's happy. It may be a bit sick, in fact, I know it is, but I'm looking forward to the craziness of Halloween. The commute is something else though. There was a snow storm this moring which more than doubled my time on the road. Took me two hours to get there. But I arrived safely. I must get in bed so that I can get up and get to work on time tomrrow. This is just ridiculous. Pictures of Christmas and California to come. Oh, I think I might throw in some Thanksgiving pics too, since there are some pretty darn cute ones there.